So, the baby and the election and stuff…

Yes, I’m still pregnant.  I just never talk about it… and while I do think of it a great deal more than I talk about it, even that isn’t nearly as often as I did with Evelyne, so I’m already feeling the onset of second-child guilt!  Clay and I decided to not share the name because I just don’t even want to deal with hearing people’s opinions.  You wouldn’t believe how many weird looks and questions I got when I would tell people Evelyne’s name before she was born.  It’s like people think they have a free pass to say whatever pops in their head just because it’s not written on the birth certificate yet.

However, perhaps that would be more of a concern this time around if we actually HAD a name.  We sat down and talked about it and wrote-out a few options last night, and although we have a handful we’re thinking about, I still don’t feel like we’re much closer to actually deciding on something.  And there’s something about boy names, I just don’t get excited about them or think, OH I MUST NAME MY CHILD THAT WONDERFUL NAME!!!!!  like I do about girls’.  There’s several that I like, and I think, “Oh that’s a nice name,” but then I’m over it and don’t feel much attachment to any of them being the name of my child that I will say and think every day for the rest of my life.  So, any suggestions are welcome.

I spent 3 hours putting together Evelyne’s new crib the other night (I can’t even begin to tell you what a maddening experience that was. There was lots of crying and yelling and contorting my very pregnant body in awkward angles on the floor in order to screw-in a screw that just WOULDN’T SCREW!!!), so now that she’s in a real crib and out of the pack-n-play, the baby officially has an open place to sleep.  Which isn’t so important right now since he’s not due for another 10 weeks, but still.  It helps me mentally to know that IF he were here I wouldn’t have to make him sleep in a drawer or something.  (Oh, Evelyne’s crib was recalled a few months ago and we JUST finally got a voucher for a new one and actually bought it the other day… so she’s been sleeping in the pack-n-play for awhile.)

Oh, and we’re not sure that it’s a boy.  But I think it is.  I had an ultrasound when I was 15 weeks, and it sure looked like a boy to me, but it was pretty early and no one could say anything definitely.  And then there was the small matter of us being uninsured for the past five months, so we haven’t gotten another one.  (Long story short, we were dropped from our private insurance because of a miscommunication about a payment and our new address during our move and didn’t find out about it until it was way too late… since I’m pregnant, that’s considered a preexisting condition when you don’t have group coverage and absolutely no one would take us.  Thank God nothing went wrong and Clay’s new insurance kicked-in today, so we’re finally covered!)  But now our new deductible is so high that if we get an ultrasound we’ll have to pay $200 out of pocket for it.  We don’t necessarily have an extra $200 to throw around, and we only have a few more weeks anyway, but I’m trying to convince Clay that we should still do it.  (Thanks, Laura!)  For the health reasons and also because I desperately want to know the sex of the baby for sure since I feel like it’s been harder for me to attach and prepare without knowing who is actually in there.  I really feel like it’s a boy, but I don’t want to buy boy things in case it’s a girl.  And if it’s a girl, we have everything we need.  But either way, I’m left feeling like there’s not much for me to prepare and that’s just depressing.  So we are assuming it’s a boy but keeping our options open.  I’ll let you know if we get an ultrasound and find-out for sure.

Oh yeah, and the election.  I guess it’s tomorrow, huh?  Well, it was suggested to me (and I was thinking about doing it) to have a HOT TOPIC question about not voting, but I really don’t feel like going into all of that, and since the abortion post is still getting traffic and there’s only so much personal confrontation I can take at a time, I’m just gonna tack it on the end of this post about my unborn child.  I’ve decided that I won’t be voting tomorrow.  Well, to be honest, the state of Washington has helped me in that decision since Clay and I haven’t switched our drivers’ licenses and registered to vote yet, and we’re too late to for an absentee ballot in Tennessee.  BUT, really that just helped make it easier to go with what I was already thinking.  I don’t love either candidate, and while I do think one would probably do a better job than the other, I’ve had an increasing conviction that my allegiance with either would be nothing less than a personal moral compromise.  Both in the area of policies I don’t agree with and a level of political engagement that as a Christian I’m just not comfortable with right now.  It’s all stuff I’m still processing and learning, and who knows how I’ll feel in four years when the next election rolls around.  But for now I’m following my conscience (and the law, I guess, since they wouldn’t let me vote even if I wanted to!) and would rather kindly direct you to the blog of my friend and political mentor (haha!) JR Rozko for a good explanation of where I’m coming from.  He just wrote a post on why he’s not voting and included a ton of links toward other Christians who feel the same way.  He said it better than I ever could, so please feel free to direct all your comments like, “Good Christians vote!!” and “Dont’ you know it’s irresponsible people like you who are to be blamed when ____ gets elected and it’s the end of the world!!” toward him.  (You’re welcome, JR.)  I realize I’m coming from an MTV “Rock the vote” generation who might have a hard time understanding this.

So there it is, and I’m so glad this will be over tomorrow.  Although I will be surprised if one candidate beats-out the other, I’m really not too concerned that America’s fate rests in the hands of voters tomorrow.  I’m pretty sure that neither canddiate will lead us to heaven or to hell.  But the Church will keep her mission to preach the Gospel and care for the needy and walk the path of Jesus, and true HOPE and CHANGE will be the result of the kingdom of God in our world.


14 responses to “So, the baby and the election and stuff…

  1. I can’t believe that you didn’t register to vote! In my mind the presidential campaign is a pittance compared to the other topics on the ballot. Don’t you care about who the next Governor will be, or where or not we do away with carpool lanes, or if the state starts allowing assisted suicide? It’s pretty clear that Washington’s electoral votes or going to Obama but don’t you care about the stuff that might actually effect you and your children’s every day life? I am not trying to lecture you I just thought you cared more about that sort of thing.


  2. ha! I’m cracking up picturing you putting that whole crib together – you poor thing! I would have (lovingly) told Robert he needed to do it. 🙂 And I completely support your decision to not tell people the name – it KILLED me when Shelley didn’t but I understood her reasoning. You could always go with “Jimmy Bud” – that’s what Robert wants to name the baby if we have a boy! BUT you are welcome to take it – hah! I say wait to have the ultrasound – it will be so exciting at the birth and may give you more motivation during labor! love you guys —


  3. Sounds like a great idea! Let’s encourage all the Christians not to vote, and see where that gets us! Please.


  4. Wonderful, thanks a ton. To be fair, a lot of the stuff I linked to wasn’t necessarily advocating the stance I took, but it was nevertheless the sort of stuff I was reading as I wrestled with the decision.

    As far as being your political mentor, please, please, follow me only inasmuch as you judge me to be following Jesus, my political mentor.


  5. I remember the putting up the cribs days…augh, what a nightmare. I remember anger and tears and thought that everything that has to do with a baby should be smiles and laughs…not true. And I can’t believe you are already that far along..almost there. 🙂
    I totally understand about the Voting thing also…I am not a fan of either candidate so I could have gone with not voting but there were several Propositions in CA this election that were pretty big that drove me to register to vote.


  6. Don’t worry, JR, I was kinda just being ironic in calling you that. =) But yes, as far as I understand it right now, it is for those reasons.


  7. Ok I thought of some name suggestions for you that to me see to fit with your naming style.


    I’m still rooting for Maverick though!


  8. I like Evan. Wasn’t that the name of one of our next door neighbors at the old house?


  9. To those who have commented or may comment about Emily’s political decision, I just want to say that I support my wife in her decision not to vote b/c it is, as she says, a decision of her conscience towards God that she does not want to go against. Plus, she also mentioned that this is not her hard and fast rule and is still working through/processing her views and beliefs on the subject. So, I would hope that every Christian would do as my wife does and submit their decisions before God instead of just doing what the majority of Christians are doing, a lot of whom are not taking their decisions as half as seriously and prayerfully as Emily is. If you disagree with her, great, but do so with your own careful thought and study, as Emily as, and don’t just make a quick judgment. Thanks.


  10. Well said bro. I feel like this day and age that if you are a Christian you’re supposed to vote one way and one way only, and if you don’t you’re a bad Christian. That’s especially prevalent in the Bible belt. We miss you guys so much and hope yall are doing well!


  11. Sorry Clay, but I still stand behind my comment and always will. It’s not a Christian’s responsibility to vote, its a citizen’s. But as Christians we especially should. It’s not just about which candidate you like, its about what they can do in office…like appointing Supreme Court Justices that can uphold or overturn cases that Christians really care about. And not to mention the people we can put on the school board, city council, etc. A vote is just too powerful to not use.


  12. the only part if find odd/funny is that she didn’t register or get an absentee ballot – she spent so much time prayerfully considering her decision, and blogging about it, but didn’t take time to register?
    dont’ get it.
    it’s her right not to vote, but had she wanted to at the last minute, she couldn’t have.


  13. I was just about to get into a long explanation of why I didn’t feel it necessary to rush to register before the election (I haven’t changed my driver’s license yet, I plan to register when I do that), etc… but then I realized that that’s just not necessary.
    Your conscience led you to vote, mine led me to abstain. Just as Christians have always had individual convictions about where their conscience leads them (everything from the meat sacrificed to idols question in the New Testament to the issue of alcohol that’s apparently still quite the hot button in some places), we are all led during different seasons of our lives to participate or abstain from certain things as God leads us. There is no room in the Church for judgement on someone else’s personal convictions in these kind of areas. So while you may disagree with the concept of Christians not voting, please consider your words when you tell (or strongly insinuate) a fellow believer that a prayerful decision to abstain from something her conscience could not give her full freedom to do was wrong. The larger issue of Christian engagement in politics is one worth discussing, but when it comes to individuals and their conscience before God, that’s not up for public debate, and there’s certainly no reason to be rude about it.


  14. Although I believe that voting is important (as I articulated on the referenced JR blog), I am very sad to hear/see the serious lack of kindness in the way this has been engaged on this blog and on JR’s. It is very painful.

    We have the opportunity to be with one another in kindness and to edify each other. That does not mean that we should ignore our differences, but that we should engage each other GRACIOUSLY.

    Personally, I have realized that as far as I am not able to empathize on some level with the view of the person I disagree with, I have not truly listened to them, and am thus not going to be able engage with them in kindness.

    I pray that we’ll all find greater kindness and empathy for one another so that our differences will actually help us to grow toward each other instead of isolate us from each other.


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